Other title options for this post included: Finn McSpool: Monster in a Bottle, Finn McSpool’s All Bottled Up, or Finn McSpool Blows His Cork. Either way, as you may have guessed, Finn is back in the wine business for this today’s post.
Once Upon A Time…
Some of you may remember WAY back in August, Finn assisted me in starting a couple batches of wine. After doing a careful study of a certain I Love Lucy episode, he thought he knew all there was about the process of winemaking.
Despite Finn’s help, I did manage to get the fermentation going, and over the fall I tended to all the other chores of turning mashed fruit and yeast into something enjoyably potable. Thankfully, Finn was too busy napping to lend a paw with these chores and they went quite smoothly.
The End is Nigh!
And I mean that in a good way. After months and months of waiting for my jewel-toned jugs of juicy joy to clarify and do whatever else it is wine does when you’re not looking, it was finally time to get that wine into bottles. And wouldn’t you know it, Finn woke from his hibernation just in time to join in…for better or worse.
Although bottling is an exciting time in any novice vintner’s life, it’s preceded by a little bit of drudgery: cleaning the bottles. And this means getting cleaning solution into each and every bottle one by one…a chore that doesn’t go any faster when you can’t find your funnel!
With the hope that all the worst of the bacteria, fungi, and other wine-destroying micro-organisms had been vanquished from my bottles, it was time to fill them.
Since I only have a siphoning tube for this step I have to use my limited knowledge of physics to make this step as efficient as possible which means placing the jug as high up from the bottles as I can manage. And let me tell you, that wine comes flying out of the jugs. Unfortunately, this makes a huge mess, so we’ll just skip any pics of this stage to keep you wine junkies out there from screaming in horror at the spilled wine that ends up all over my kitchen floor (believe me, I feel your pain).
Finn Proves He Still Hasn’t Mastered the Caber
Even though most of the bottling process is a pain in the Beastie bottom, it does have its rewarding moment. See, unlike most of life’s other frustrating tasks, you get to finish up wine bottling by bashing things with a mallet!
As you might expect, Finn was eager to hammer in that first cork. Those of you who have been with me a while may recall Finn’s less-than-stellar performance with the caber at the Scottish Highland Games.
After this embarrassing show, he resolved to get in shape so he could show those brawny Scots what an Irish monster can do at next year’s games. Thinking he had been keeping up with his workouts, I handed the mallet over to Finn. The results? Let’s just say the mallet won this round and that Finn may need to spend a little less time napping and a little more time working out if he’s ever going to take first prize at the games.
Still, Finn’s lack of might meant I got to hammer away plenty of tension by banging some fat corks into the narrow necks of ten wine bottles. So therapeutic!! The bottled wine is now resting in its rack and Finn is very impatient for the first taste test. Let’s just be glad he’s not even strong enough to wield a corkscrew!
How about you? Any wine-y tales to tell? Any thoughts on monster-assisted winemaking? Be sure to drop a line in the comments before you leave!
I’ll be back next Wednesday with some more news from my writing world. And Finn will be back in a couple weeks. In the meantime, don’t miss out on snagging two FREE books by entering your email here, or by clicking the image below.
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